Bigotry and Board Games

Okay this is fucking stupid. I loved to play Risk as a kid, and moreover, back when we were dating Leanne would destroy me at the game...and then rub my face in her victory for days on end. Yup, sometimes I miss her a lot.

So its kind of jarring for me to see that the 'new' Risk (seen here) is so chock full of over-the-top masculinity that it hurts my groin. All over the website we have the wonderful tagline 'Man Up!' and the link to the mini-game reads 'ARE YOU MAN ENOUGH' in big bold letters. Gee, considering my ex-girlfriend used to beat me mercilessly into the ground every time we played, I guess I'm not you bunch of jackass misogynists.

Playing the online version of the game is equally stupid. Turns out, you need to earn 'manliness points.' After playing a mini game where I have to avoid my boss and screw around at work I earned a measly 200 points where I got the rank of 'not as manly as you want to be huh?' Gee I guess not. I didn't realize shrugging off responsibility was an indicator of how much of a man I was and ironically, at the all-boys high school I attended, they taught me that taking on responsibility was actually the manly thing to do.

So I'm gonna call you out on this HasBRO. are you gonna 'man up' to the fact that you really fucked this one up and take this shit off the Internet and issue an apology? Or are you gonna run around the office and avoid responsibility like your pathetic little online game.

In the meantime, I'm gonna go play 'Settlers of Catan'.